Thursday, March 27, 2014

TO BECOME AN ADULT



As I'm entering the season of graduation, and the anticipation/anxiety of providing for myself, I've recognized some horrific habits that I've adopted. Perhaps they aren't so horrific, but more so completely unhelpful in concerning the entering of adulthood. So I've created a list of 3 traits that I intend to focus on uprooting in order to make the post-college transition easier. 

1. The inability to look at my bank account without dread, fear, and mini panic attacks. Even if I already know how much I have.

I got my first "real" (non-babysitting) job at 15-years-old, and began to deposit checks in my bank account. I was rarely places I could spend money without my mom, unless she bravely decided it was ok for me and my friends to walk to the CVS across the street from my neighborhood. So my small pay checks were spent on candy and Popstar magazines. But I never kept track of my spending. Maybe because I didn't know how. But eventually, I would just spend and hope for the best. And throughout my high school career I over-drafted more times than I can count, failing to ever learn my lesson. I was too scared to check. It was like closing my eyes while driving. I would rather just not know and suffer the consequences. IDIOT. I know. Although my overdraft days have been over for awhile *fingers crossed* I still would rather go to the dentist than check my bank account. So I've challenged myself: check my accounts everyday. Even if I know I there will be no difference from yesterday. Just check it. So that I can get in the habit, and so that I can hopefully drive out that anxiety. Also, I need to create a financial plan. But first things first. (Tips, encouragement, financial advice are MORE than welcome).

2. Speaking up for myself.

One of my top strengths is "harmony." I don't like conflict, and I avoid any type of confrontational situation. I enjoy being the peacemaker, and I am confident in my ability to hold my tongue and go with the flow. However, any strength taken to an extreme is a weakness. So although I rarely say things without thinking it through first, sometimes in my desire to avoid conflict I don't voice my opinion. I recognize my need to speak up for myself, and I intentionally did so the other day and felt SO empowered. My first concern was to go about it in the most gracious way possible, making it light hearted in order not to draw unnecessary weight or tension to the matter. But in the end my side was heard, and that's what is important. 

3. Not taking this "adulthood" thing too seriously. 

Yes, I need to take my finances seriously. I need to take my jobs seriously in order to pay my bills. And of course, I want to take my relationships seriously. But I've realized that if my perspective on post-grad life is all gloom, work, money struggles, and no fun... that's exactly what it's going to be. I want to take risks, and I want to go on adventures. And I believe I can do these things while being responsible. I only get this time in my life once, so I want to soak it up and enjoy it for all it's worth. The first rent checks, car payments, and early morning work days included. I want to be fully content, and confident that I'm making the most out of this season.

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